How Frequent Flyers Are Getting F@#%ed

 

Air travel sucks. 

We all know and accept this. From the second I settle into my seat, all I can think about is when I can get off this plane. I'm not afraid of flying or anything like that. I just hate it. Trapped in a confined metal tube, squishing my tall frame into a cramped space, trying to decide if ordering a drink is worth it because then I'll have to either rub my butt or my crotch against two sleeping people when I have to go to the lav...it all sucks. 

Oh, and it's somehow getting worse? That legroom keeps getting shorter, so the airlines can cram more sardines into the can. We have to pay extra to bring a suitcase with us now? And for the food? Wait, there's no real food on this flight sustain life on this tiny bag of pretzels. 

Ticket prices keep going up, even as the airlines are reporting record profits. Yet, we customers put up with it. Why? Because it's by far the safest, fastest, and most efficient way to travel long distances. Duh. We need the airlines as much as they need us. They know this and treat us accordingly. 

Despite all this there are actually people who love to fly. So much so, they make it their profession. They work a job that is somehow equal parts chaos and drudgery so that you can get where you need to go.

You probably don't think about flight attendants that much. If you do, you likely picture Britney up there, being "Toxic."

 Or maybe's it's Leo:

Pop culture makes being an FA look glamorous, but the reality is anything but. When people find out I'm a teacher, they have a basic understanding of what I do. People generally think the most important thing FAs do is pour coke. However, FAs are an integral part of air travel. They're highly trained and required by law. Without them, none of us fly.

And they are getting completely and totally ripped the fuck off. 

So you know how terrible it is when you show up at the airport, all charged up to go on vacation/visit family/head home, and you look up and see the second-biggest airport curse word: "DELAYED" (only "CANCELLED" rates higher)? Your day has been ruined. You showed up on time, checked your bags, waited in the security line...you did everything right. And now the airline hasn't held up its end the bargain, and you're stuck in an airport, which isn't quite a circle of hell, but it's in the suburb adjacent. You are so pissed/dejected, and you're at the mercy of the airline. 

Well, flight attendants experience all that too. Yeah, you may be saying, but that's their job. That's what they get paid for. 

Here's the thing, though: They don't. 

You know how when most other hourly employees show up at their job, dressed in their uniforms, they get paid from the time they start work? That's not true for FAs. The amount of time FAs work without pay is criminal. I mean that word literally. The amount of wage theft FAs endure should be against the law; I have no idea how it doesn't violate several labor standards. Apparently it has something to do with the Railway Labor Act of 1926. Seems fair.

FAs don't start earning their hourly wage when they arrive at the airport parking lot. They don't get it when the shuttle drops them off at the terminal. They don't get paid starting at their required "report time," typically an hour before scheduled takeoff. During this unpaid time, they are doing required safety checks of all medical supplies, door checks, and aircraft safety checks. They also do galley stocking/inspections, talk with the pilots about the required flight plan, gate agents about boarding times, ramp agents about bags). All of that sounds a helluva lot like "work" to me. 

The first time you probably notice the flight attendants is when you are boarding the plane. There they are, on the actual plane, making announcements, helping people find their seats, settling disputes between passengers. This is clearly an integral part of their job, right? Obviously they're being paid for this, yes?

No. Flight attendants are only paid for actual flight time. That's it. I'm telling you, it's criminal. 

Think of it this way: Your flight is delayed two hours. Maybe you go to a restaurant or a bar. Maybe you buy a book. Maybe you play on your phone. But you hang in there because you still want to get to your destination. But to a flight attendant, the destination is immaterial. They're there to do their job, and they only get paid when the plane is in the air. Two hours' delay is just two more hours at work without being compensated for their time. 

Oh, and you know how when your flight gets cancelled, you now have to get on hold with the airline and wait for them to figure out how to get you where you're going? FAs have to deal with that exact same thing with crew scheduling, where they can be on hold for hours at a time. Except the flight attendants weren't going anywhere special to them in the first place. The flying was the whole point. So now they're holding on the phone, trying to figure out where to head to next, and not being paid a cent for any of it. 

You know that excruciating time after the plane touches down and arrives at the gate, and you have to watch everyone in front of you gather their belongings in slow motion, and all you want to do is GET OFF THIS GODDAMN PLANE? The FAs are right there with you, only they have to smile and say goodbye and waive and pretend to be happy even while they are, say it with me now, NOT GETTING PAID FOR THIS SHIT. 

Then there's the "all they do is pour coke" thing. Flight attendants must travel to and undergo a six-and-a-half week training program where they learn actual life-and-death aviation procedures and stuff they have to promise not to reveal to avoid the threat of imprisonment, like what to do in case of a terrorist incident. They work 8-10 hour days, 6 days a week. They get a hotel room and $20 a day for food. Do they get paid for this training? If you've read this far, I think you know the answer to that. Oh, and then there quarterly trainings that last 4-6 hours. They get paid for one. Every 18 months there is a 10-hour training. They are paid for three, which somehow is more demeaning than none. 

Once they complete the training, the reward is to work for roughly $30 an hour.* But not before they are forced to PURCHASE THEIR OWN UNIFORMS, the cost of which is slowly bled from their paychecks over the next two years for an average of about $2,000. They sound high quality! Except that they frequently rip and break, particularly the zippers, and then the FAs have to buy replacements at hundreds of dollars a pop. Glamorous!

Wait, there's more! A Harvard study found that FAs are at higher risk for cancer, in particular breast, respiratory issues, and all-cause mortality. But if they call in sick too often due to these issues, they get fired. 

If you got this far, you might wonder why anyone would stay in this profession. Here's the thing: We NEED them to stay. Constant turnover isn't just bad for employees, it's bad for passengers, too. Recently, a glimmer of hope emerged:

This only happened because Delta's FAs threatened to unionize. The airlines WILL respond to pressure, so we need to support FAs and their unions. 

People need to realize what flight attendants go through. Five or six days a week, they deal with the travails of air travel, which most of us take on as seldom as possible. Their whole job is the thing I dread and avoid when possible.

Shouldn't they at least get paid for doing it? 

*Everything cited here is true for one of the major airlines (not Spirit, a real airline). FA pay varies, especially dependent on whether it's mainline (like Delta), or regional (Skywest), who make less and are highly exploited.